


Over the Muted TV

by talefeathers



Category: Romeo And Juliet - All Media Types, Romeo And Juliet - Shakespeare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cute, Drabble, Fluff, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Relationship Study, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:07:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23879647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talefeathers/pseuds/talefeathers
Summary: Mercutio and Valentine have always loved to put the TV on mute and provide their own ad-libbed voiceover.
Relationships: Mercutio & Valentine
Kudos: 2
Collections: Romeo & Juliet, Tumblr Drabbles





	Over the Muted TV

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: "Things you said with the TV on mute."

It was a game the two of them had been playing since they were little: they would flip channels until they found a movie that neither of them had ever seen—the older the better—and they would put that movie on mute so they could provide their own ad-libbed voiceover. They hadn’t been introduced to _Mystery Science Theater 3000_ until they were both in their teens, but that was very much the idea.

Today’s selection was an overacted black-and-white Agatha Christie ripoff on Turner Classic Movies. A man and a woman spoke tensely to one another in one of the murder mansion’s bedrooms.

“Now Margaret, I’ve had just about enough of these tantrums,” Valentine snipped in a macho mid-Atlantic that perfectly matched their hero. “If this is what’s going to happen every time you snort that crack cocaine—”

“Oh, Harold, please don’t start!” Mercutio cut in when the dialogue shifted to the delicate, angular heroine. “You know that I haven’t hit that smack in five hours or more! I’m trying to tell you that—”

“Well, I’m telling you I’ve had enough!” Valentine jumped in, leaving Mercutio laughing over his own tangled tongue. “There’s a murderer on the loose, you need to have your shit about you!”

That little turn of phrase earned such delighted giggling from Mercutio that he almost wasn’t able to pick up his side of the conversation when the woman began to speak again.

“Roderick, how many times must I say it, you know I merked all those bitches in a drug-addled passion—”

“Nonsense, your womanly emotions—” Valentine tried valiantly to continue, but the absurdity of what Mercutio had just said caught up with him and he dissolved from there into helpless laughter, with Mercutio following closely behind.


End file.
